Kids, Allowance, and Chores

Some parents give allowances with no requirements on the child's part. Others make performing chores a condition of receipt.

Child experts hotly disagree on whether allowances should be conditioned on performing chores. Each side believes strongly in its position. On the one hand, requiring work for pay prevents a child from believing in entitlement. There's value in doing work and being rewarded for it, and it's good training for getting a job.

On the other hand, others believe that chores should be required just because a child is part of the family. Just as Mom and Dad aren't paid for shopping, cooking, and repairing the broken porch, a child should be required to contribute his time and effort to help with the family work load. Conditioning the receipt of an allowance on performing work can lead to disaster. A child may think that all jobs around the house should be monetarily compensated. A child who continually tries to negotiate and renegotiate his workload and allowance may be in perfect training for a job with a union or the NLRB, but he can cause endless friction on the home front.

Obviously, the decision of whether to attach strings to an allowance comes down to what you think best in your family. You may, of course, be influenced by whether you were required to perform chores when you were a child and how you felt about that at the time. Whichever way you come out, make sure that the rules are clear—and be consistent. Think through which alternative you'll use, and then follow through.

There's another string that some parents put on the receipt of an allowance: good behavior. If a kid fights with his brother, breaks a lamp, or talks back, a parent might threaten to dock his allowance for this bad behavior. Some child experts think this type of string isn't a good idea, though: They don't believe it works to create good behavior—it just punishes a child without any benefit. You, of course, must decide on punishment for bad behavior, and you may think that withholding an allowance for a week or a month may be appropriate in certain circumstances.

Checking on Chores

If you think that chores should be required as a condition to receiving an allowance, spell out just what's expected of your child. Detail what your child has to do and how often. Some tasks may have to be done only once a month; others, such as taking out the garbage, must be done twice a week.

Obviously, chores need to be age-appropriate. You're not going to have your 7-year-old mow the lawn, but he can walk the dog or change the cat's litter box. Generally, it's a good idea to keep chores to those tasks that can be performed quickly (say, 15 minutes or so). Also change chores periodically so that boredom and other complaints are avoided. Here are some chores that you might consider asking your child to do and how often to do them.

Keep track of how well your child is doing on the chore front—you may have to make reminders. Consider posting the checklist where it'll serve as a reminder to your child (for example, in her room or on the refrigerator).

Canceling for Nonperformance

What happens if you've laid out an elaborate work schedule for your child and she fails to do some of the chores during the week? Do you reprimand her? Do you adjust or withhold her allowance?

Obviously, if there's no reduction in allowance for nonperformance, your child may come to believe that there are no consequences for bad behavior. On the other hand, it's tough to withhold money if the violations are minor or infrequent. And what do you do when your child is sick or injured and can't do the chores? However you decide to act, make sure that your child knows what will happen, and be consistent about it.

Excerpted from The Complete Idiot's Guide to Money-Smart Kids © 1999 by Barbara Weltman. All rights reserved including the right of reproduction in whole or in part in any form. Used by arrangement with Alpha Books, a member of Penguin Group (USA) Inc.

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