Home > Kids > Behavior and Discipline > Behavioral Problems > Anxiety > Ten-Year-Old Fearful of Everything
|

Expert Iconexpert advice MORE

Ten-Year-Old Fearful of Everything

Toddler and Teenager Expert Advice from Carleton Kendrick, Ed.M., LCSW

Q: My 10-year-old daughter is complaining of being afraid of "everything." She says she is afraid of the kids at school who tease her, she is afraid to be upstairs in our home if we are downstairs, she loves to go to her grandparents but is afraid to leave us. She likes to read outside under a big live oak, but is afraid if the dog is not with her; the list goes on and on. I have tried to explain that everybody is afraid of some things, but that you can't let fear rule your life. I don't know if this is normal for an only child who is very smart. I don't know if I am responding the best way to help her. Any insight would be appreciated.

A: Researchers have agreed for some time now that kids of your daughter's generation have been exposed to far more anxiety-provoking information than past generations. It's all around them in all forms of media. Kids also may take the fear they associate with one particularly disturbing incident and allow that to be generalized to many other situations, some seemingly harmless from an adult's perspective.

We have to understand the origin of our children's fears, empathize with them, but help them not to become fearful of everyday and novel situations. A sense of control and an action plan are necessary to provide anxious kids with the knowledge they can do something about their fears. Two excellent books that will help you come to more of an understanding of your daughter's anxieties and fears and assist you in helping her deal with them are: Triumph Over Fear, by Jerilyn Ross and Keys to Parenting Your Anxious Child, by Katharina Manassis. If you feel these fears are compromising your daughter's day-to-day abilities to function at an optimal level of health and comfort, a consultation with a talented child/family therapist could be most useful.

More on: Expert Advice

Carleton Kendrick has been in private practice as a family therapist and has worked as a consultant for more than 20 years. He has conducted parenting seminars on topics ranging from how to discipline toddlers to how to stay connected with teenagers. Kendrick has appeared as an expert on national broadcast media such as CBS, Fox Television Network, Cable News Network, CNBC, PBS, and National Public Radio. In addition, he's been quoted in the New York Times, Washington Post, Chicago Tribune, Boston Globe, USA Today, Reader's Digest, BusinessWeek, Good Housekeeping, Woman's Day, and many other publications.


Please note: This "Expert Advice" area of FamilyEducation.com should be used for general information purposes only. Advice given here is not intended to provide a basis for action in particular circumstances without consideration by a competent professional. Before using this Expert Advice area, please review our General and Medical Disclaimers.

stay connected

Sign up for our free email newsletters and receive the latest advice and information on all things parenting.

Enter your email address to sign up or manage your account.

Facebook icon Twitter icon Follow Us on Pinterest

editor’s picks

highlights

Join BIC on our mission to save handwriting and Fight For Your Write! Writing helps kids become better readers, boosts their confidence and sparks their creativity. Visit BICFightForYourWrite.com to sign our petition to save handwriting!

7 Tips for Reading Aloud to Babies & Toddlers
The AAP advises reading aloud to babies and toddlers because it boosts brain power and has many other benefits. Get some tips for making the most of story time with your tot!

Kindergarten Readiness App Wins Gold
Our Kindergarten Readiness app won the Gold Award of Excellence in the educational category at the 2014 Communicator Awards. This valuable checklist comes with games and activities to help your child practice the essential skills she needs for kindergarten. Download the Kindergarten Readiness app today!

How to Survive Summer Boredom
When the kids are home all day, every day, summer boredom strikes hard and fast. Learn the best summer boredom busters and tips for surviving until September.

12 Birthday Party Favors that Won't Get Thrown Away
The next time you're planning a birthday, forgo the penny candy and cheap toys. Send your guests home with one of these fun and creative party favor ideas!