Accept a Helping Hand

When we really need a break, it's often because we are trying to do everything alone. We might not know what we want, hesitate to ask for help, or hint rather than ask for the kind of help we'd like. Also, we may be too critical about how someone helps. In the interest of your mental and physical health, try a more effective way to getting the help you deserve.

• The first step to getting what you want is to know what that is. What do you truly need today? Could your spouse take over a task at home? Would a coworker represent you at a meeting? Might a friend meet you for lunch? Could you use a miracle?
• The second step is admitting to yourself and then to someone else that you need help. The jig is up. You are not a superhero. You need some help.
• Now ask specifically for what would help you most. No hinting or implying. Be assertive. Whether you're asking for divine guidance or help from a mere mortal, be clear about what you'd really like.

Remember, if an offer of help does arrive, don't insist that it be done precisely your way. Try not to second-guess or nitpick. You've caught a break — and you deserve it. Now give the "helper" a break. Be grateful.

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Excerpted from Recharge in Minutes ©2003 Suzanne Zoglio, PhD www.zoglio.com Buy the book

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