Negotiate

When you're all worked up emotionally, there's a good chance that you're upset because your needs are not being met or someone is not behaving according to your expectations. Instead of losing any more energy on what "should" have gone differently, put your energy into getting what you want.

• Think of a situation that has you upset. What has someone done (or not done) that you wish they hadn't?
• Now, translate that into what you do want — a request.
• Consider what the other person really wants.
• Decide what you're willing to give to get what you want — if necessary.
• Now, schedule a meeting to discuss your concerns with the other person — to "negotiate."

Quite often all we have to do to get our needs met is to know what we want, know what others want, and be willing to work for a solution that benefits all parties.

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Excerpted from Recharge in Minutes ©2003 Suzanne Zoglio, PhD www.zoglio.com Buy the book

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