Recognizing a Baby's Needs in the First 3 Weeks

In the first few weeks, I would recommend that new parents feed their infant whenever the infant appears hungry (feeding her on demand), as a way of getting to know their newborn. Each time parents try to feed a crying baby, the infant will let them know whether she is crying out of hunger. As parents try other techniques—holding, rocking, singing—they will begin to match their responses to the baby's needs. They will recognize different cries: hunger, boredom, fatigue, discomfort, pain, discharging an overloaded nervous system. As the infant begins to form patterns of waking and sleeping, parents can begin to respond to these and help her remain alert and responsive in the daylight hours. As they learn to understand and respond to their infant's behavior, parents automatically push a small infant to stretch out between feedings. Watch for the balance of awake and sleep states. It will help you understand how to help her into a reliable sleep pattern.

As the sleeping pattern becomes more reliable over the next few weeks, it is time to begin to establish bedtime rituals that will be useful throughout the child's infancy.

• Nurse the baby or bottle-feed her in your arms.
• Rock and sing.
• Calm her and then place her in her crib before she is asleep. If necessary, rouse her to a semi-awake state before putting her to bed—so that she can learn to put herself to sleep.
• Sit beside her to croon and pat her down.
• Never prop a bottle in bed beside her. She could choke and inhale milk into her lungs. Milk or even sugar water or juice in her mouth all night can harm her future teeth, so don't leave her with a bottle.

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