Behavior Makeover: Homework Battles
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Talk to other parents. How do they feel about their kids' homework load? Ask what tips (if any) they have for minimizing nightly homework hassles. If you know parents of kids in your child's class, find out how their kids are managing the assignments. Do they think the tasks are too hard, too easy, or just right. This information will help you assess your kid's abilities.
Now it's time to take action to begin making over your kid's behavior. Use your Make over Journal to write down your thoughts and develop your plan.
- Think about the underlying causes of your homework battles. First, determine if your child is really capable of doing the homework. For instance, are the tasks above his abilities? Is he easily distracted? Does he have the skills needed to achieve Success? Writing a list of your concerns will help you develop a plan to deal with them.
- If the tasks are really too difficult (or so easy he's bored), set up a conference with his teacher to find out her or his perspective. Does your child need tutoring? Is the class too hard? Is the reading (or math) group too difficult? What changes can be made to ensure your kid does succeed? Write a plan.
- Think how you are reacting to these battles. Are you hovering, pleading, correcting, signing, bribing, protecting, demanding? if so, how will you change your reaction so it doesn't hinder your relationship with your kid?
- Now comes the big question: How much of the work is your kid doing on his own? Remember that homework is for your kid, not you. Your job is W guide, not do. Reflect on what's not working, and then make a plan to turn it around.
- Reread the eight strategies. Then choose the two that might help your kid the most. Write out the steps you'll take to ensure that you succeed.
- If you find your child is really having a difficult time with homework or your relationship with him is suffering, consider hiring a tutor. Ask your teacher or other parents for recommendations. HINT: Don't overlook a high school student as a possible tutor.
More on: Behavior and Discipline
From No More Misbehavin' by Michele Borba, Ed.D. Copyright © 2003 by Michele Borba. All rights reserved. Used by arrangement with John Wiley & Sons, Inc.
Buy the book at www.amazon.com.