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Attitude Makeover: Arrogant

The First 21 Days
Start a Humility Crusade in your home by encouraging all family members to look more for the good in others and less in themselves. Follow these steps:

  1. Pick your favorite skill, hobby, or focus of interest, from Barbies to the Middle East conflict.
  2. Find two or three experts who know a whole lot more than you do, and read up on everything they've said on the subject.
  3. Have a family discussion on several of these topics that highlights modesty, focusing on other people's thinking, and serious learning.
Another aspect of the crusade could have these steps:
  1. Focus on the specific content of an arrogant remark, like a claim to know more, or do better, or be superior in some way.
  2. Dig down and find out the real feelings underneath. Does your child really feel that this is true, or is he only pretending?
  3. If he thinks it's true, point out the reality of the situation: that he is not the best, doesn't have the most, and so on, and show him that it doesn't matter. You love him anyway.
  4. If it isn't true, show empathy for his insecurity and need to compensate. Again, show him that you love him no matter what and find out what you can do to help him overcome the fear and anxiety that actually provokes this arrogance.
Attitude Makeover Pledge
How will you use these steps to turn your kid's arrogant attitude around and achieve long-term change? On the lines below, write exactly what you agree to do within the next twenty-four hours to begin changing your child's attitude so he is less of a know-it-all and more considerate of other people's ideas and opinions.

The New Attitude Review
All attitude makeovers take hard work, constant practice, and parental reinforcement. Each step your child takes toward change may be a small one, so be sure to acknowledge and congratulate every one of them along the way. It takes a minimum of twenty-one days to see real results, so don't give up! And if one strategy doesn't work, try another. Write your child's weekly progress on the lines below. Keep track of daily progress in your Attitude Makeover Journal.

Week 1

Week 2

Week 3

Ongoing Attitude Tune-Up
Where does your child's attitude still need improvement? What work still needs to be done?

Next: Resources >>

From Don't Give Me That Attitude by Michele Borba, Ed.D. Copyright © 2004 by Michele Borba. All rights reserved. Used by arrangement with John Wiley & Sons, Inc.

Buy the book at www.amazon.com.

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