Parent Checklist: Giving Positive Feedback

How Are You Doing?

Here are a few questions to help you assess how well you're doing in making your kid feel cherished, especially when he's misbehaving. Check any potential problem areas:

_______ Does my kid overhear me talk about her to others in positive, loving terms and not about her misbehaviors?

_______ Do I avoid comparing her to siblings or peers?

_______ Do I avoid berating her in front of others?

_______ Do I always discipline my child privately and with dignity?

_______ Do I have reasonable expectations, based on the age, personality, and development of my child?

_______ Do I stop and consider my child's point of view and listen openly to his opinion?

_______ Do I remember to compliment and encourage my kid when he is good?

_______ Do I stay calm whenever I discipline my child, never raising my voice, yelling, or hitting?

_______ Do I schedule one-on-one special time to enjoy being with my kid and give my full presence?

_______ Do I avoid taking sides when there's a conflict between my kids, or would my child say I show favoritism?

_______ Do I lash out at my kid because I've had a tough day?

_______ Do I accept my kid's natural temperament, and have I made peace with his personality?

_______ Do I always insist on having my way because "I'm the parent"?

_______ Do I try to eliminate a behavior in my kid because I see it as a problem in myself?

_______ Do I end each discipline episode by letting him know I love him and forgive him?

_______ Do I acknowledge to my kid whenever I was unfair or acted inappropriately?

More on: Behavior

Excerpted from:

From No More Misbehavin' by Michele Borba, Ed.D. Copyright © 2003 by Michele Borba. All rights reserved. Used by arrangement with John Wiley & Sons, Inc.

Buy the book at www.amazon.com.