Feeding at 4 Months

by T. Berry Brazelton, M.D., author of Feeding: The Brazelton Way

Feedings should be more predictable now. Nearly all babies will have settled into a rhythm of 3-4 hours between feedings. Each feeding now is more likely to last for a predictable amount of time. A bottle feeding may take 10 to 15 minutes plus bubbling time. A breastfeeding can last 20 minutes, and sometimes more—with burping and bubbling. Quiet talking and gentle play, so rewarding, may add a little more time. The baby takes in half of his feeding in the first 2 minutes, and 80-90 percent in the first 4 minutes. If he falls asleep after that, he's probably had enough. But if he wants to nurse for longer, and if his mother wants him to, this can be a delicious time for closeness. The baby certainly won't be overfed with these longer feedings.

It has always seemed to me that a parent who takes a few minutes in the beginning to talk and hug and alert the baby, to calm him down if he's frantic, will have a more rewarding, smoother feed.

You probably know your baby's cries by now. The intense, end-of-the-day fussing should be over by now. An alert period of smiling and interacting may have replaced it. By now parents will feel more confident about knowing their baby and what to expect with each cry. Hunger cries are like no others, and you and your baby both know them.

A number of questions will linger in parents' minds during this period:

Q: Will I spoil him if I feed him every time he cries?
A: I don't believe that a baby this young can be spoiled. But be sure you recognize his ways of telling you about his other needs. He will tell you several different things by his cries. Not all cries are hunger cries. There are different reasons for them, such as boredom and the need to play, or fatigue, and the need to be put down to sleep. Each of these needs, and others, are expressed with different cries. Look for them, and you will feel more in touch with him.

Q: He seems to want to eat so often. What can I do to hold him off?
A: This is the age when you can begin to respect your baby's newly developing abilities. When you go to him in less than 3 hours, try to substitute play for your feeding for awhile. He is probably ready for some play on his own. Hang a few colored objects (e.g., plastic spoons) over his crib, so he can look at them as they twinkle in the light. These should be removed when the baby can successfully reach, and they should be fastened securely enough that he or an older sibling can't pull them down. Prop him at a 30 degree angle so he can look at them and listen to them. You may be surprised to see that, with the chance to watch, listen, and try to reach, he'll become intrigued.

He will discover that he can play by himself, handling his boredom and enjoying his waking time between feedings. This certainly will help you—and think what it may mean to him to sense that he can take care of some of his own needs. Then you can both gratefully enjoy the reward of a feeding at the 4-hour mark. You have both worked for it!

Q: Why does he wake up to feed every 4 hours at night?
A: The 4-hour sleep cycle at night is a normal one. Actually, you may be lucky. At least your child sleeps for 4-hour stretches at night instead of waking more often or staying awake at night and sleeping during the day. But this is a good time to begin to push him to learn how to sleep longer at night. As his brain begins to mature, he may be ready to go longer at night.

Continuing to pick up and feed him every few hours could lead to sleep troubles. Feedings every 4 hours at night may not be the answer now. Learning to get himself to sleep may be.

I have found that when a baby has begun to learn how to get himself back down, interrupting the 4-hour cycle can help break it. Wake him at 10:00 or 11:00 P.M. before he wakes himself. Feed him an extra feeding then, without play or exciting interactions. Put him down before he's asleep, leaving him to get himself back down to sleep. The extra feeding can break the every-four-hour cycle, and it may help him learn to get himself to sleep and to sleep longer at night. It has worked to push many of my patients toward an 8-hour sleep at night. Feedings may help, but they won't contribute to the real job of "learning how to sleep."

Excerpted from:

Excerpted from Feeding: The Brazelton Way © 2004 by T. Berry Brazelton, M.D., and Joshua D. Sparrow, M.D. All rights reserved including the right of reproduction in whole or in part in any form. Used by arrangement with Perseus.

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