Mothering a Daughter: Four Essential Ingredients

Although volumes have been written on the subject of mothering a daughter, the four ingredients that follow are absolutely essential to her happy and healthy growth into adulthood.

Essential Ingredient #1

The first one is easy, or least it ought to be: Be a loving, accepting presence.

Essential Ingredient #2

The second one is a little more difficult: Trust your educated intuition. Moms have every right to believe in themselves. So-called experts aren't the only ones who know a thing or two about raising daughters. Paula J. Caplan, Ph.D., author of The New Don't Blame Mother, says that the whole notion that experts are the only ones with sound reasoning here intensifies a mother's unfounded sense of inadequacy.

So trust in your own "educated opinions." This book is in no way meant to encourage mothers to relinquish their creative thought or authority in favor of the printed word. The information provided needs to be consumed, digested, and applied by your special brand of mothering to your very unique daughter. "Mother knows best," is, as far as I am concerned, a valid statement.

Essential Ingredient #3

The third one requires thinking outside oneself: Maintain an open-minded vision. Without this ingredient it will be difficult to see your daughter's point of view, accept her dreams, or recognize her special gifts.

Essential Ingredient #4

This ingredient poses a singular challenge to the woman called mother: Never lose sight of yourself.

Excerpted from:

Excerpted from The Complete Idiot's Guide to Mothers and Daughters © 2001 by Rosanne Rosen. All rights reserved including the right of reproduction in whole or in part in any form. Used by arrangement with Alpha Books, a member of Penguin Group (USA) Inc.

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