Marriage: Treasuring Your Past
The Spice Rack
On a cold winter night, make a fire, pop some popcorn, and watch family videos together. You'll have a great time, and it'll make you feel like the soul mates you are.
Don't forget all of the difficult things you and your spouse went through together. They will be reminders that you can make it through hard times.
You are creating a past from the moment your relationship starts. The memories you create between the two of you are yours and yours alone. When you are going through a difficult time with your spouse, think about some wonderful memories that the two of you share. Your past can also be your best teacher. You can use the past to learn from your mistakes and do things differently now and in the future.
Relive Fun Times
One of the best ways to relive fun times is to do things that help you remember them. The following are some ideas to bring back your wonderful memories:
Look through your photo album together.
Listen to music you danced to when you were first dating.
Visit old friends you have not seen in a while.
Have dinner at the restaurant you went to on your first date.
Go back to a special vacation spot.
Rent a movie you enjoyed together when you were first married.
Take a second honeymoon and stay in the same room in the same hotel, if possible.
Visit the place where the two of you met.
Remembering the Hard Times, Too
Many people try to forget the difficult times in their lives. For instance, they might not want to remember an illness they suffered or a huge disagreement they had with their spouse. It feels painful, and people think it's best to push it aside. Actually, it can be a source of strength and give you a feeling of triumph to know that you successfully overcame a difficult challenge.
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Excerpted from The Complete Idiot's Guide to the Perfect Marriage © 2001 by Hilary Rich and Helaina Laks Kravitz, M.D. All rights reserved including the right of reproduction in whole or in part in any form. Used by arrangement with Alpha Books, a member of Penguin Group (USA) Inc.
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