When you're all worked up emotionally, there's a good chance that you're upset because your needs are not being met or someone is not behaving according to your expectations. Instead of losing any more energy on what "should" have gone differently, put your energy into getting what you want.
- Think of a situation that has you upset. What has someone done (or not done) that you wish they hadn't?
- Now, translate that into what you do want a request.
- Consider what the other person really wants.
- Decide what you're willing to give to get what you want if necessary.
- Now, schedule a meeting to discuss your concerns with the other person to "negotiate."
More on: Dealing With Stress
A series of "quick-lifts" excerpted from Recharge in Minutes, ©2003, by Suzanne Zoglio, Ph.D.