|

Choose Your Response to Offense

If you live long enough you will encounter tactless people, ungrateful bosses, or insensitive family members. Your choice is to react defensively from a place of fear, hurt, and anger, or respond deliberately from your center of power.

  • Express yourself. Tell the offender how her behavior or statement affected you, using a constructive "I message" that includes impact, offending behavior, and your request. For example, "I was so embarrassed when you told the group how I messed up. In the future I'd prefer you let me share my own mistakes."
  • Forgive the offense silently. Chalk the offense up to human error, remembering two things: you are not so different from the offender since you probably have caused someone similar distress at some point in your life, and the person may not have had malicious intent, just a lack of skill or insight. Try forgiving both the offender and yourself.
  • Decide not to take offense in the first place. Realize the comment or action has little to do with you and much more to do with the other person's needs. Try a little empathy.
Offense can be found everywhere or nowhere, depending on who's doing the looking. Make it a practice to always assume positive intent.
|

A series of "quick-lifts" excerpted from Recharge in Minutes, ©2003, by Suzanne Zoglio, Ph.D.

Buy on Amazon


stay connected

Sign up for our free email newsletters and receive the latest advice and information on all things parenting.

Enter your email address to sign up or manage your account.

Facebook icon Twitter icon Follow Us on Pinterest

editor’s picks

easter fun
& crafts

Egg-cellent ideas
for tons of
Easter fun.

GO

highlights

Healthy Smile Checklist for Kids
Have better dental check-ups with this free printable checklist that helps keep your child flossing, brushing, and smiling! Brought to you by Philips Sonicare.

Kindergarten Readiness App
It's kindergarten registration time! Use this interactive kindergarten readiness checklist, complete with fun games and activities, to practice the essential skills your child needs for this next big step. Download the Kindergarten Readiness app today!

8 Easter Egg Decorating Ideas
Need some fun ideas for decorating Easter eggs with the kids? Look no further for colorful and cool designs!

7 Ways to Curb Kids' Exposure to Violence
American children are exposed to violence more often than you might think. Learn how to limit your child's exposure to violence and manage the mental health and behavioral effects it can cause.