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Get out of the Blame Game

"She makes my blood pressure soar." "That jerk ruined my day." "I really messed that up." Thoughts like these signal that you're smack in the middle of a blame game — a game that you are certain to lose. The time you spend blaming yourself or someone else is time you could be spending on what to do next.

  • What's one thing you've been blaming yourself or someone else for lately — so much so that you haven't spent much time looking for a solution?
  • Right now, decide to shift to solution thinking with thoughts such as: "Okay, this is the situation. No matter who or what caused it, it is. Now, what can I do to move forward?"
You can't undo what has already been done, and certainly you can't control how others behave. But one thing you can influence is what YOU do next. When the milk is spilled, don't look for the culprit. Just mop it up and pour some more.

More on: Dealing With Stress

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A series of "quick-lifts" excerpted from Recharge in Minutes, ©2003, by Suzanne Zoglio, Ph.D.

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