Home > Kids > Behavior and Discipline > Discipline Strategies > The 12 Disciplinary Elements
|

The 12 Disciplinary Elements

Like most things in life, positive discipline happens all at the same time. If you're changing your approach to your children's behavior, it can seem overwhelming. My personal way of dealing with a seemingly impossible task that makes my anxiety levels soar is to break it into a whole bunch of little tiny parts, each one of which can be easily accomplished. My friend Ailsa calls these the “approachable increments of infinity.”

Here then, are my Twelve Disciplinary Elements. Each one is doable. They're not steps, because you climb a flight of steps one after the other (unless you're like my 86-year-old grandmother and take them two or three at a time). They're pieces of a whole; once you get them working they happen all at once, and each element isn't fully effective without the others. We'll look at each element, and concentrate on making them work for you.

  1. Pay attention to your child.
  2. Respect your children and yourself.
  3. Be reasonable, gentle, and firm.
  4. Prevent and minimize problems through understanding, communication, and modeling.
  5. Use positive reinforcement to encourage and reward proper behavior.
  6. Teach ways to make choices.
  7. Set reasonable personal expectations and goals for your child.
  8. Set reasonable expectations for yourself and your family.
  9. Communicate effective and reasonable limits.
  10. Understand misbehavior.
  11. Provide related, respectful, reasonable responses.
  12. Be consistent.
|

Excerpted from The Complete Idiot's Guide to a Well-Behaved Child © 1999 by Ericka Lutz. All rights reserved including the right of reproduction in whole or in part in any form. Used by arrangement with Alpha Books, a member of Penguin Group (USA) Inc.

To order this book visit Amazon's web site or call 1-800-253-6476.


highlights

Vote Now for the Children's & Teen Choice Book Awards
Voting is open now through May 3 for the Children's and Teen Choice Book Awards — the only national book awards program where the winning author, illustrator, and books of the year are selected by young readers. Encourage your child to vote for his favorites today!

Find Today's Newest & Best Children's Books!
Looking for newly released books for your child? Try our new Book Finder tool to search for new books by age, type, and theme, and create reading lists for kids!

10 Best Outdoor Toys of 2015
Looking for an amazing toy that will keep your child playing outside until the sun goes down? See our picks for 10 hot new outdoor toys for all ages.

Registered for Kindergarten — Now What?
Wondering what to do now that you've signed your child up for kindergarten? Try our award-winning Kindergarten Readiness app! This easy-to-use checklist comes with games and activities to help your child build essential skills for kindergarten. Download the Kindergarten Readiness app today!

stay connected

Sign up for our free email newsletters and receive the latest advice and information on all things parenting.

Enter your email address to sign up or manage your account.

Facebook icon Facebook icon Follow Us on Pinterest

editor’s picks