Helping Your Kids Cope with Tragic News

by Carleton Kendrick

With the tragedy in Arkansas, children of all ages are hearing about violence committed by children, senseless killing of other children, and issues concerning safety at school. Children rely on parental empathy, understanding, support, and answers to help them through their questions and fears. Graphic news footage and photography of violent events involving children during this crisis are everywhere. Parents and educators need to immediately address these concerns--even though the incidents happened elsewhere.

Here are some ways to help your kids understand horrific events and their impact:

1. In an effort to protect our kids in the aftermath of such a troubling event, we tend to cut off their expressions of confusion, anxiety, and fear by interrupting them--"Don't worry or think about this anymore. Nothing terrible like that is going to happen in your school." Parents need to take the time to listen attentively to what their kids are trying to express. Only then can we address their specific concerns and fears.

2. Admit to your kids that awful, unexpected things do happen in life, but that you and the school staff are there to protect them. Reassure young children that they and your entire family are safe. Speak confidently of your intention to keep everyone safe.

3. These last four school shootings (in the past five months) have been committed by adolescents. Encourage your kids to tell you if they hear any child threatening to harm himself or others.

4. Open a dialogue with your school system about addressing the larger issues of kids' increased exposure to media violence and the creation of school-based conflict resolution curricula. A parent/school alliance and action plan to deal with these issues will empower families and children.

Read Carleton Kendrick's bio.

More on: Communicating with Your Kids