Beyond Blame

by Dr. Michael Simon

One of your son's teammates coughs up the puck and the other team scores the winning goal. After the game, your son rips into his teammate.

What to say:
Try saying "I know that was a tough loss, but instead of blaming each other, a good team takes responsibility as a whole. It takes an entire team to win or lose a game. I'm sure Josh feels terrible about this mistake, too. Put yourself in his place. You don't need to rub it in."

What this accomplishes:
In addition to addressing the importance of empathy, this comment reminds your son that everyone on the team wants to do well, that everyone needs to pull for one another, and that all athletes make mistakes. This will help your child modify his expectations so that they are more realistic.