Make Rules More Flexible for Toddlers

The toddler years can be messy and frustrating for parents, but instead of focusing on those negative aspects, take an understanding perspective. Toddlers lack the fine motor coordination to use a fork or spoon without making a mess. Sometimes they resort to using their hands to eat. They tend to spit, throw, or squash foods, talk with their mouths full, and fidget. Are they intentionally trying to thwart you? Not at all. Toddlers explore the world of food colors, tastes, and textures with both their hands and their mouths. Nevertheless, it is not a waste of time to begin teaching them how to eat healthy.

Plan for the mess by putting a plastic sheet under the high chair. When your child throws food, gently say "no," but don't pick up the food until the meal is over. Don't turn food-throwing into a game where she throws and you fetch. Offer a variety of food at meals but keep the portions on her plate at any one time small. You are less likely to worry if a couple of small pieces of food hit the floor rather than a whole bowl of food.

Sit your child down for meals at the table or in the high chair as a habit. Toddlers are inquisitive and would prefer to eat and explore, making a mess in the process. You should be patient and understanding but firm, realizing that eating while walking and running can increase your small child's risk for choking.

It's better to not force your child to finish everything on his plate. It is better to waste a few leftovers than battle with your children or force them to eat when they've had enough. Keep in mind that toddlers can recognize their hunger and fullness signals and, unlike adults, don't go on hunger strikes. For reassurance about your child's development, however, ask your pediatrician to review his growth and height charts at your next visit.

Simple rewards may reinforce your child's good behavior. I would suggest being effusive in your compliments when your children demonstrate appropriate table etiquette. You might also offer stickers or hand stamps as a reward, but never use food as a reward: that can lead to unhealthy habits in the future. As always, be a good role model. If your kids see you eating in front of the television between meals, they rightfully won't understand why they shouldn't.

More on: Nutrition for Babies and Toddlers

Excerpted from:

From Raising Healthy Eaters: 100 Tips for Parents by Henry Legere, M.D. Copyright © 2004. Used by arrangement with The Perseus Books Group.

To order this book visit perseusbooksgroup.com.